The other I day I saw a bumper sticker on a car that read, “You’re a loser. I’m a Goddess. Any questions?” Did I mention that the car was parked in a Walmart parking lot, where I’m sure the owner of the bumper sticker was, at that moment, purchasing a matching velour track suit with tweedy bird on the front and the word Goddess bedazzled across the butt.
I’ve never really been a bumper sticker kind of guy. I’m not adamantly opposed to them or anything. I guess I’m just not clear on why I would need to communicate random opinions, preferences and facts about my personal life to the car tail-gating me at any given moment. And do I really want that person reading tiny messages on my car. Maybe they should be watching the road instead. I kind of understand having “a” bumper sticker or perhaps “a” tasteful window static, but it’s seems that some people are trying to write an autobiography on the back of their vehicle. In fact, I’m pretty sure some of them bought minivans just to have more surface area to work with. Why do I need to know that you surf, compete in triathlons, play guitar, like dogs, have 3 kids (who are honor roll students at various different schools), use an Apple computer and vote Republican? Can’t we just meet people and let them find out interesting things about us on their own without having to publicize it with our little, mobile PR campaign?
Sorry about all the rage against bumper stickers. I may have some unresolved issues there. You may be a bumper sticker person who has a whole list of reasons for the importance of, no… the necessity of, bumper stickers. If so, I apologize for my naïve and ill-informed rant. The truth is, you’re not alone. We all try to tag ourselves in some form or fashion. It’s just that some of us use less explicit and ridiculous ways to do so. Like slipping into a conversation the fact that you play guitar, like me. (See how I did that… it’s that easy) And any other bits of information that we think will make people like or respect us more. It seems it’s just a part of our desperate search for the ever-illusive sense of self-worth and approval.
And I guess it doesn’t really matter what form it takes; bumper stickers, bedazzled pants, designer clothes, fancy cars, sports jerseys, self-endorsing statements thrown into conversations at the first possible moment. They’re all attempts to do the same thing. Looking to other people to provide us with something that can only come from God himself, namely – value. And the thing about God is, we don’t have to impress him in order to get it. Which is a good thing because there isn’t a cool enough bumper sticker for that.